Glory for Girls

My good friend, Brittany Clotfelter launched Glory for Girls this fall. It is a great product as it is all natural and very hip. Introduce your tweens and teens to it for healthy skin and lots of fun. Use the above coupon for 20% off your purchase. Go to http://www.gloryforgirls.com/ and use the code BFF to receive your discount.

Emotional Eating

Is it really dieting that is difficult or is it maybe that you are eating out of emotional needs that are not being addressed? I used to think I ate out of boredom and I do think I did sometimes. But then, my pastor started working on helping me to overcome bitterness and lack of forgiveness. This has been hard work. It is difficult to come to the realization that I really do hold onto bitterness and I really do have a hard time forgiving people. We can be bitter with our spouses, our parents, with life itself, with God. Life is not easy. We have so many things to work through and many times, instead of working through them, we eat or drink or do drugs or whatever we can do to help ourselves avoid dealing with our real issues. Once I realized that I was avoiding the hard work of forgiving and seeking forgiveness and instead holding onto things and acting as an addictive person instead of one who deals with her "things", I had an unexpected side effect. Firts of all, a huge weight has been lifted from me. Second of all, those things that I wish not to eat have ceased calling my name at all hours of the day. I don't have this anxiousness about me that I have carried with me forever, I presume. I am a happier person. I can see that when I give in to the temptation to eat things I know I ought not to eat or to drink more wine than I should instead of dealing with things that need to be dealt with, I become stronger. I do not wish to continue in the viscious cycle of having those things call my name, saying no, then giving in and then being mad at myself. Instead, I sit and think, am I hungry and if so, how can I best nourish myself. If I am not hungry...then why do I want to eat? What do I want to keep hidden down inside of me? Am I mad at myself, am I mad at my husband. Have I been forgiven, have a sought forgiveness, am I bitter? When we give in to the viscuous cycle, we make ourselves weaker and more vulnerable each time. It is just the same as letting in a little sin. Then we become desensitized to the little sin and we let a little more in until it is full blown, out of control sin. Little by little it takes a big toll on ourselves and those around us. I have been working really hard in this area of having an addictive personality. I have realized that when I am giving in to the temptations that damage me, I have nothing to give to anyone else. Now that I am dealing with my issues when they arise, my focus goes from being inward to being outward. I have much more concern for the needs of those around me instead of having a preocupation with how I am going to fullfill my immedeate needs of covering up those emotional hurts. I have so much more energy. Maybe before I was afraid to feel good. There are many reasons a person may be afraid to feel well. A good question to ask yourself is, "What you are gaining from your constant ailments and "inability" to lose weight." Start thinking about what you CAN eat to be healthy and not so much what you can't eat. Eating healthy gives you youthfulness, vitality, energy, inner strength, happiness, etc... It is amazing what self control can do for a person. It is also amazing what can happen to you if you begin to deal with your emotions that you have been stuffing for years. We all have them. Stop trying to lose weight and start trying to be a healthy person. The weight will fall off. I have never been able to stick to a diet to save my life, but when I focus on being a healthy person in all areas... physically, emotionally, and spiritually, weight is a non issue. I am not at all saying that all non skinny people are emotional eaters, but if you have the viscious cycle thing going on, you may want to look at why you eat more than you want to be eating. If you are always on a diet, that is a good sign that there are some deeper things you may want to look at. Sometimes it is necessary to get help in this area. Our pastor has been an amazing help to my husband and me. A good friend may be able to help or even a counselor. It's amazing what can happen when you become honest with others and yourself.

Giving Advice

We have had a trying last 3 years, very trying, and b/c of that we have received a lot of advice, some solicited and some not. I have learned a lot about giving advice through receiving advice and thought I'd share some of what I've learned. Many times when a person tells you about their situation, they are not looking for you to solve their problem. They are much more looking for a listening ear and most likely some empathy. In our latest trial, one person, namely my sister-in-law, Lisa, listened to me at one of my worst points during that trial and simply said sincerely, "I'm so sorry you are going through all of this, I had no idea." It had such a profound impact on me. Empathy goes a long way when you are struggling. It taught me a lot b/c many times when I have a friend who is hurting I might turn the conversation to myself and how I have somehow endured much of the same trials. That is not what a person needs to hear in the moment of discouragement.

Another good friend of mine, Crystal, had a great way of helping me to decide whether or not to take on a new business. I am currently looking into becoming a rep for CAbi, a clothing line that has a very personal approach and awesome clothing. This opportunity really excites me and what I have found is that most well meaning people tell me I should or should not do this. I know they are just trying to help and I do value their opinions immensely which is why I ask their opinion:) My freind Crystal had a different approach that was so helpful to me. She simply asked me some questions. For example, "What does Tobin think about you starting this business?" "Do you have friends that would do shows for you?" "Is the money you have to put into it something that you could lose if it didn't work out?" She even offered her support in saying she'd host a show for me. She asked if I had thought about waiting a little longer to make the decision. She did not ever say, yes you should do this or no, definitely don't do it. Her approach is the one that has really made me weigh the pros and cons and has been very effective in helping ME decide if this is right for me and my family. In turn it has taught me a ton about giving a friend advice:)

Top Fruits and Veggies to ALWAYS Buy Organic

These are the top fruits that are the most heavily sprayed with pesticides...strawberries, cherries, apples, Mexican cantaloupe, apricots, blackberries, pears, nectarines, raspberries, artichokes, grapes and fresh peaches. You should only purchase these when you can buy organic. The non organic vegetables to stay away from are spinach, hot and sweet peppers, cucumbers, squash, lettuce, green beans, celery and potatoes. Blueberries, chard and bananas are better choices when you cannot buy organic.

The vegetables that are less toxic from pesticides are: eggplant, peas, broccoli, cauliflower, mushrooms, asparagus, tomatoes, cabbage, onions, radishes and avocados. Of course, organic is always better as there are many studies proving that they have much higher nutrient levels as well as being less toxic.

Some more fruits that are safer when non organic are oranges, tangerines, grapefruit, pineapple, melons, watermelons, papaya, mangoes, kiwi and plums.